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Inside vs Outside Voices, Day 19

February 12, 2010

I’ve run out of ways to distract and exhaust myself and have come to one conclusion.

Before I conclude, let me say I had a wonderful time with my dear friends at rehearsal for Orpheus Lex and therefore know that that part of my week will keep me both paid and happy.  I also discovered that waking up early is a necessity when the day is full and the only other time to work out, aside from the morning, is after 9pm.  Apparently, after 9pm, my gym at Dyckman Street turns into Planet Fitness’s unfortunate solution to keeping the morons and, for lack of a better word, hoodlums off the streets.

In my frustration at Planet Fitness, I heard myself say, “Shut up!  You are so loud!” to the woman yelling in Spanish on her cell phone next to me on the strange cross between an elliptical and a stair master.  Yes, that was an outside voice, and yes, I’m grateful she didn’t really react.  Believe it or not, I still had to exhaust myself even further and push myself way beyond my workout limit before admitting to myself that exercise wouldn’t fix my frustrations.

So, I came home and had an important conversation with someone about a conflict we’ve had recently.  I’m spent, bed has been calling for hours, and I don’t know if I’ll wake up able to move or attempt another day at the gym before rehearsal.  It was well worth the time spent.  We all have friends, family, and loved ones beyond worth our efforts to communicate our concerns, our needs, and our care.  Without clear conversation and expression with those who matter to us, we just end up shouting or cursing the random person who irritates us or gets in our way.  Sorry about that, cellphone over-user.  I still hate that you use your cellphone at the gym, but I shouldn’t have taken it out on you.  I meant to use my outside voice with someone else.

Day 19, I had a conversation with someone who matters.

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